Pennies Pennies Everywhere and Not a Use in Sight
by false sourires
Summary: America and Canada discuss their mutual pennies.


Disclaimer: Not the creator of Hetalia, or any of the characters in the fic.

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**Pennies Pennies Everywhere and Not A Use in Sight**

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Annoyance beams from a steely glare locked firmly on his chest.

"No."

The intensity of the glare increased. Sighing, Canada crossed his arms over his chest, balefully muttering,

"What?"

"You're getting rid of your penny."

How a simple statement of facts could sound so menacing he would never understand. For the love of Maple, how had he found out?

"Yes, the mint is going to stop issuing pennies at the end of this year. Why do you have an issue with that, Al? It's not like it's your penny. Besides you're always complaining about my penny."

Canada stated succinctly with an added glare. Two could play this game brother. America humphed loudly, lightening his glare minimally.

"Cause your penny is annoying! Why'd you have to go and model it after my penny anyways?"

"Did not."

America ignored the squawked indignation.

"Bad enough you went and put a limitation on the on the number of pennies you can spend on one transaction."

"All because you went on an outrageous spending spree, and insisted on paying for everything in pennies!"

Canada ranted irately with an angry flush tinting his cheeks. America waved his hand dismissively at him.

"Hey, I paid all those bills in full. I even tipped them. They had no reason to complain about being short-changed."

"You paid $1,356.43 total in pennies!"

Canada rebutted wondering how he could make his brother see sense.

" So? Not like I paid anyone with more than 4,000 pennies."

Oh Maple, he was going to have to explain to the Prime Minister and President why he killed his brother.

"And you expected that waitress to count all 4,000 pennies to make sure that you had paid the bill? How do you even have that many of my pennies?"

"No, I expected her to put the pennies through a coin converter. Duh. And, your people are always leaving your pennies in my house, so it's not like I can spend them. Ergo, I had to come visit your house so I could get rid of them. Do you know how much space your pennies take up?"

Unbelievable. Canada stared blankly.

"Why didn't you just put them though a coin converter in the first place? Then you could have paid in bills."

…Like a normal person, Canada thought aggravated. America gave him an 'are you stupid' look.

"The principle of the matter."

With that, Canada let go of all restraint and tackled his soon-to-be-dead brother. Surprised at the action, America didn't react soon enough and they fell to floor where Canada grappled him into a headlock.

"Idiot."

America rolled.

"Shut it Mattie."

"No. I am not going to listen to your idiocy anymore-Gaak!"

America broke out of the headlock, twisting to get a better grip on Canada.

"Uh huh, and you've never done the same? Like you haven't paid for a traffic ticket in my pennies?"

Canada wriggled out of America's reach.

"I have diplomatic status! I should not have had to pay the stupid traffic violation in the first place. Of course I paid in your pennies. And your people leave just as many of your pennies in my house as mine leave in yours."

America finally managed to get a grip on the struggling Canada.

"Then keep your ID with you moron! I know it was _tickets_, Matt. Nice how your passive aggressiveness excuses you doing it, but not me."

Fired up, Canada kicked out attempting to reverse their position.

"I am not passive aggressive!"

Canada stated bitingly, finally managing to push the startled America off of him.

"So how about you tell me what this is really about?"

"What?"

America queried as his grip loosened. Rolling his eyes at his brother's obliviousness Canada answered tetchily.

"Your need to complain about my penny, because you feel threatened your own copper Lincolns are going to disappear soon. Do your people even know that you don't use copper anymore, but fancy monopoly money?"

"Am not."

America pouted moodily. Canada rolled his eyes.

"Not really."

America amended quietly under his breath.

"You still have your five dollar bills Al, and I have no doubt you will find some other over the top way to honor your president."

"S'pose."

"Besides we aren't abolishing the use of pennies just yet, so you can continue to pay your exact 25 pennies a purchase when you visit- Hooser."

Snorting America rolled his eyes.

"Fine. But you really need to stop paying your traffic tickets in pennies, Mattie. It's illegal now."

Canada started to pout.

"But there's no rule against dimes."

Smiling, Canada stood up from the ground patting himself off. Holding out a hand he helped America up.

"At least we will always have dimes."

America rolled his eyes at the cheesiness of the line, but still smiled.

"So how long have you been paying attention to my news for, Al?"

Canada beamed at the familiar glare boring into his back.

* * *

**Omake**

* * *

The Prime Minister and President watched their two nations walk out of the conference room. Harper turned to Obama.

"135,643 pennies?"

"Seven traffic tickets?"

Both regarded one another with resigned amusement.

"So I guess I should congratulate you on removing the penny from circulation?"

"Ah, yes, you're still having problems with that I see."  
"Yes, every time I come close to stopping the minting an interest group restarts the "Save Our Penny" campaign. "

The President shook his head despairingly.

"And with this election, the Republicans would find some way to make it anti-American whether or not it lowers the debt."

Sipping on his drink, the Prime Minister raised his brow.

"So you print monopoly money instead?"

"It's zinc and copper!"

The Prime Minister smiled as the President frowned in protest.

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**Author's Note**:

Well, I'd been wanting to write a penny fic for awhile, and this is a bit late, but I got it posted. I swear whenever I go to convert change to bills, I always end up with several Canadian pennies that I can't convert no matter where I am in the States. On occasion, I'll even find Canadian dimes. No idea if Canadians have that problem with US pennies, but I pretended Canada does in this fic. The fact that Canada is going to stop minting pennies this December has been all over the news here, and stirring up the debate over whether the US penny should stop being minted. Obama has in the past said he would support the end of US penny being minted, and that we could commemorate Lincoln somewhere else, even though Lincoln is on the five dollar bill. Large protests begin whenever an attempt to stop the minting penny begins though.

Canada will continue to allow the usage of the penny even though it will stop minting, but it is apparently illegal to pay for transactions with more than 25 pennies, so I thought it would be funny if America had with transaction in all pennies prior to the law being made. In the States it is illegal to pay for fines and bills in all pennies, so I thought Canada would have done this after having received speeding tickets he was forced to pay even though he was technically a diplomat. The monopoly comment is a personal opinion I have on pennies printed in the 2000's feeling like toy money, even though the US mint swears they are made of copper and zinc. On another note, I laughed like crazy when I found that Canadians had marked the US penny as sacrosanct to US citizens when conducting a study about whether or not stop minting the Canadian penny.

Thanks for Reading,

False Sourires


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